Praying while peeling eggs

You’ve probably heard about how hard the constant goodbyes are on missionaries, but perhaps not about the politics of their stuff (it certainly never crossed my mind until we began work in East Asia). What I learned is that when someone is returning permanently to their sending country, it’s too expensive for them to take their frying pan with them… but they will still have to rebuy one once home. So they will give it away, sell it for a pittance, or try and get its actual value to maximize their resettlement fund.

Things get extra tricky when the item being ‘got rid’ of is much sought after by fellow missionaries in that country. Both sides know full-well how hard it is to get an XYZ locally, and how many other missionaries want it, but no-one wants to look selfish.

It basically becomes a garage sale where both seller and buyer like each other and know the financial pressure each are under—but aren’t quite sure how much ground they can afford to give. Missionaries generally work hard not to be ridiculously over-charged in the local marketplace, plus they have to make a third-world salary work in their sending country when they visit, so they’re hard-bargaining cheapskates by training. If you think the Christian dance of wanting but not taking the last chocolate at Bible study is awkward, imagine that situation but with Jesus-loving vultures instead.

All that to say, when I was offered a highly-prized food processor by a family heading home to the States, I was gob-smacked. They had my full attention when they told me that the only thing they wanted in return was that I pray for them whenever I used it. I quickly agreed with less thought and more greed than I should have, but—watching the machine whir its way through hummus and healthy soups—pray for them I did. More and more gratefully each time.

That family’s generosity taught me a lesson about the higher value of prayer compared to objects. And my experience of praying for them long after they had gone, long after I probably would have remembered to otherwise, encouraged me to link prayer, objects and memories together for other people.

It’s not complicated, and simply leverages the brain’s native ability to connect a narrative to a stimulus. When someone gives me a gift, or teaches me something, or takes me somewhere, whenever I use or do or visit in the future, I pray for them. For example, I used to meet for breakfast and Bible with a friend who taught me how to quickly peel boiled eggs. Now peeling eggs equals time to pray for her. Today I am wearing a skirt a friend bought me to wear to job interviews; I spoke to God about her when I got dressed this morning.

What exactly do I pray? It honestly depends on whether prayer newsletters or Facebook statuses have provided any recent information. If I know of a specific situation, I pray about that. If they aren’t yet Christian, I usually pray that God would soften their hearts towards him, as I see their salvation as their biggest true need. But if you have no idea at all, ask God to deepen your friend’s love for and trust in him. A reliance on God will see them safely through both sunny and stormy days.

These prayers aren’t long, but they are a great way to both speak with God throughout my day (reminding me who my day should really be all about) and keep me connected to and thankful for people who in many cases I don’t see much anymore. They are not a substitute for a focused quiet time of extended talking with God—they don’t generally tend to much reflection on his glory, for one—but they encourage me to use any time I can on him and caring for his body of believers rather than imagining what I’ll eat for lunch.

Give it a try. The stronger the connection between your memory and the habit the better, but it will get stronger each time you pray. If you’re not sure of how to start, maybe you could find an old birthday card and start using it as a bookmark, praying for the sender when you read. When you cook someone’s favourite food, make praying for them a step in the recipe.

Songs, bus stops, gym exercises… everything can be used to help you “pray without ceasing” (1 Thess 5:17). While I doubt that Paul meant that in the very strictest literal sense, I’ve never met a person guilty of praying too much. We are more likely to need all the help we can get. I hope that the family who couldn’t keep their food processor have given some to you.

If you're on the lookout for ways to improve your prayer habits, check out Help for a Sick Prayer Life. The three articles in this MiniZine will not eliminate the struggle to pray regularly, but will provide you with weapons, armour and renewed courage for the battle.