Expecting to repent

For even if I made you grieve with my letter, I do not regret it—though I did regret it, for I see that that letter grieved you, though only for a while. As it is, I rejoice, not because you were grieved, but because you were grieved into repenting. For you felt a godly grief, so that you suffered no loss through us. For godly grief produces a repentance that leads to salvation without regret, whereas worldly grief produces death. For see what earnestness this godly grief has produced in you, but also what eagerness to clear yourselves, what indignation, what fear, what longing, what zeal, what punishment! At every point you have proved yourselves innocent in the matter. (2 Cor 7:8–11)

Are you surprised by your sin?

Rebelling against God and committing idolatry is not meant to be natural; after all, we were created to love God and obey him joyfully. But it should not shock us to know that, willingly or not, we all fall short of doing what is right. We disobey God. We fail to love others. We are more concerned with our wellbeing than with the welfare of those around us. Because of this, it should not surprise us when we recognize our sin—or when others point out our sin to us.

Having begun following Jesus by repenting of our sins, do we really think that repentance is something that has no relevance in the present? A friend from church once said to me, “James, if you point out where I’ve fallen short, then I’ll prayerfully do my best to repent of my sin and grow from this experience”. That was a far cry from my own kneejerk responses to rebuke. At the time, I didn’t know how to respond to his wise words!

It is a humbling experience to be faced with your sin—many of us don’t cope well with it. We may respond with defensiveness, bewilderment, and denial. My own tendency is to hover and wait for my rebuker to make a false or exaggerated claim, and then expose it as soon as possible. Why? If I can show that they haven’t fairly and accurately represented me every single moment, then their entire rebuke is invalid. It is a way of discrediting them and denying my own sinfulness.

While it is true that not every claim of sin is always legitimate, the Christian receiving rebuke and correction should display humble, quiet, patient and thankful sorrow that leads to repentance. And even if some charges may not be accurate, we should focus our attentions on the ones that are rather than draw a spotlight onto the ones that will distract from our transgressions.

Our attitudes regarding correction should be thankfulness for God’s kindness in showing us our sin, and grief over how we have transgressed vertically (against God) and horizontally (against others). We should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and sluggish to criticize others who have seen, or been affected, by our actions and are bringing them to us.

When we do acknowledge our own sins, it is right to expect that as followers of Jesus we will be grieved. However, Paul’s words in 2 Corinthians 7:8-11 demonstrate that sorrow over one’s shortcomings is not an experience unique to Christians alone. Grief is universal throughout humanity when we recognize our failures in a legal sense (guilt) or a communal sense (shame). But while sorrow is common, the response to the sorrow is not. Worldly sorrow leads to death. I take it that the reason why worldly sorrow does not lead to repentance is because it instead can result in (for example):

• Wallowing in one’s wrong
• Resolving to try harder next time
• Denying the wrong ever happened
• Blaming others for the wrong.

We can spend a substantial amount of time tearing ourselves and others down, denying the impact of our actions, and seeking to punish ourselves and others. These responses don’t lead us to God. Godly grief leads to repentance; sorrow that is pleasing to God leads the person in the wrong back to God through confession, repentance, and forgiveness for that wrong.

The gift of God in Jesus Christ is eternal life and the pouring out of his Spirit, who helps us put to death the sin in our lives (Rom 8:13). Followers of Jesus have the great assurance that, as we have been justified before God and forgiven by him, we will be glorified and freed from sin (Rom 8:22-30). But until then, we expect to repent.

Examine your heart today: do you ready yourself to humbly, quietly, patiently, and thankfully grieve over your sin and repent of it? The next time someone points out some shortcoming or wrong you have committed, evaluate its legitimacy but do not be surprised that you may have fallen short and need to repent. After all, repentance is an expectation and lifestyle for followers of Jesus.