Pray out loud: practical tips

I wrote last time about how it's good for people to pray out loud in our small groups: for encouragement, modelling, and sharing our struggles. What I want to do here is outline a few ideas to help draw people out a little, and help them gain the skills to pray out loud.

Explain Christian prayer

We often take it for granted that everyone knows what Christian prayer is about, but it's now less and less likely that people have had modelled to them what it is to pray to a living God in a personal way with assurance that he hears. It’s worth explaining a few fundamentals such as:

• Even though other people are listening to our prayer, we’re praying to God. That’s why we pray “Dear God”.

• The Bible teaches us that through his death and resurrection, Jesus has made it possible for us to pray (Heb 10:19-21) so that’s why we close our prayers with “In Jesus’ name we pray”.

• Jesus’s death and resurrection have given us access to the throne room of God, so we can be sure God hears our prayers and we can approach God with confidence (Heb 10:19-21). That’s why we don’t need to impress God with fancy words.

• Because of Jesus, we don’t pray to a distant God—we pray to God as our Father (Rom 8:15; Gal 4:6) so we can pray “Dear heavenly Father”.

• We close with the word “Amen” as a way of inviting others to affirm our prayers and say they agree. Saying “Amen” at the end of the prayer is also a great way for us to encourage a new person in the group.

• When we pray on our own, we use the word “I”. But in a group setting, we’re inviting others to pray with us and to say “amen” to our prayers. So that’s why we pray using the word “We”. For example, “We pray for June’s mum—please help her to recover quickly from her surgery.”

• Because we’re praying in a group setting, it’s important to pray with a clear and fairly loud voice rather than a whisper. This is especially important for people who are used to changing their tone of voice or lowering their voice when they pray. Some people have grown up thinking this is more respectable to God. But whispering makes it hard for others to hear, especially if you have hearing impaired people in your group, mothers with little babies, or you meet in a noisy environment.

You’ll be surprised how much more comfortable some people feel to pray out loud once they understand these basic elements of prayer. It’s like giving them the club T-shirt so they feel part of the group.

Model short and simple prayers

Jesus’ warns us not to pray with “empty phrases”, “many words”, and “long prayers” for pretense, thinking that this is what will impress God (Matt 6:7-8; Mark 12:40). This doesn’t mean long prayers are never ok. But it’s worth making a conscious effort to model to others that short prayers with simple words are not simply adequate, but heard by God just as much as longer prayers. This is especially important with people who struggle with English, literacy, and concentration (for example, some who are ill or elderly). Long prayers with complicated words or Christian jargon make it very hard for people to understand and follow along. And if that happens, it defeats the purpose of praying out loud together.

Here are some examples of short, simple prayers:

“Dear God, thank you for our time together today. Help us believe that your word is living and active. As we study the Bible this morning, give us understanding so that we may love Jesus more and more.”

“Dear heavenly Father, we praise you that because of Jesus, you forgive us our sin. When we feel like our sin is too bad to be forgiven, help us to remember that Jesus’ death is the perfect sacrifice for all our sin.”

Naturally, it’s hard to always pray at a level that everyone will understand, especially if there are non-Christians or new Christians in our group. Sometimes, this creates opportunities for explanation or to make a time to catch up over a meal or a coffee. But if you know your sheep, then you can cater the prayer times so that they don’t feel excluded by lack of understanding, or overcome with anxiety that they can’t pray with the ‘sophistication’ of the rest of the group.

Teaching and praying and speaking in such a way that people can understand is a Biblical principle that Paul explains clearly in 1 Corinthians 14. In this chapter, Paul commands the gathering church to conduct their activities in an orderly manner, ensuring one person speaks at a time and that tongues and prophecy must always be interpreted so that the whole church is built up. This is why Paul says that words that are not understandable exclude the outsider and refrain a person from understanding God.

Give people the opportunity to prepare their prayer beforehand

If someone’s shy or English isn’t their first language, they often find it hard to pray on the spot. Try suggesting they prepare the opening/closing prayer during the week and offer to read it through and help them with their English expression. Make sure you say positive encouraging comments, especially if you do need to correct an aspect of the prayer.

Once someone is willing to pray, it’s helpful to ask if praying first will help them feel less nervous. For some people, having to wait until last makes them very anxious.

Prepare a selection of Scripture based prayers

Write out a few prayers based on the Bible, print them out and ask each member of the group to choose one to pray out loud at the end of your Bible study time. You could also write prayers that reflect the words and teaching of the study you are covering that day.

This method has the added bonus of teaching people to pray Scripturally based prayers and to expand what they pray about. Paul’s prayers are often long and complex and could be too hard for some in your group. Personally, I find them hard to pray all in one go because his knowledge of God is so deep. But don’t abandon Paul’s prayers altogether—break them down and paraphrase them if you need to. You could also select one idea at a time.

Here are some examples:

Dear heavenly Father, we bring before you our missionary family, the Griffiths. We pray that that the word of the Lord may speed ahead and be honoured as the Griffiths talk to Portuguese people about the gospel of Jesus. We ask all of these things in the name of Jesus. (2 Thess 3:1)

Dear Father in heaven, help us to truly believe that you are always close. Help us not to be anxious about anything. When we’re worried, help us to pray to you with thanksgiving in our hearts. As we pray, remind us of the peace we have in Jesus that can calm our hearts and our minds. We ask all of this in the precious name of Jesus. (Phil 4:6-7)

Dear God, your word tells us that when Jesus comes back, He will appear in the clouds of heaven with power and great glory. And that no one knows when He will return. Please help us to be ready for His return. We pray this in the name of Jesus. (Matt 24:29-44)

Dear Father in heaven, help us to bring honour to Jesus. Help us do good works and understand you better. Please give us your power to keep trusting Jesus and to be joyful, patient and thankful to you. Thank you that you have given us eternal life by taking us away from the rule of Satan and bringing us into the kingdom of your son by saving us and forgiving us our sins. In Jesus’ name we pray. (Col 1:9-14)

Prepare a selection of topics and people to pray about

You could include:

• Missionaries by name with their latest prayer points.

• The ministry team, leaders and leaders of your church.

• University ministries and Scripture in schools in your area.

• Kids’ ministry leaders in your church.

• Non-Christian friends and family by name—that they will hear the gospel and have faith in Jesus.

• For discipline and consistency to draw near to God by reading the Bible and praying every day.

• Marriages in your church or group.

• Mission events coming up.

• Specific sin that people have shared about and need help with.

• For the development of the fruit of the Spirit—picking one area of growth to focus on (Gal 5:22-23).

• For those who are elderly, sick, and grieving in your community or church.

• For federal, state and local government and our prisons.

• For Christians around the world who are persecuted for their faith in Jesus.

• Praise and adoration—don’t forget this. Sometimes it’s worth asking people to pray 1-2 praise points that start with the words “Dear God, we praise you that you are …” or “Dear heavenly Father, we give you praise that Jesus is …”.

In my experience, more often than not people don’t understand the difference between praise and thanksgiving, so they revert to thanking God for something he has done for us. Whilst thanksgiving is good, it is useful to teach our people to praise God for who he is. Here is an example:

"Dear Father in heaven, we praise you that Jesus is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn of all creation. We give you praise that by him all things were created, in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities—all things were created through him and for him. In Jesus’ name we pray." (Col 1:15-16)

Some weeks, you could try printing out a sheet of paper with some topics to pray about some options of pre-prepared prayers.

I've got other tips for fostering group prayer, but I'll save them until next time. In the mean time, what have you found that has been useful in helping people pray out loud?