Superficiality can’t be solved glibly or easily

You’ve reached the end of a fantastic study. The group has been engaged, asking good questions; you feel like you’re seeing a group of people keen to apply the word of God to their lives.

You reach the application questions. And nothing. No one comes up with anything.

Or worse, they come up with things, but they’re maddeningly vague.

All it takes is one person to say “I think that the church should be more welcoming”, and you’re off in the land of abstraction, where every application is the domain of some vague group of people. No one in your group needs to take responsibility for anything that’s going on.

You’re back in the familiar place. No one in the group wants to reflect on their own actions, and are happier finding fault with the general herd-like behaviour of “people at church” rather than suggesting a way that they themselves might make a difference.

Perhaps the application of the study involves them changing some aspect of their life or conduct. But no one is prepared to talk about their own struggles. It’s all generalities and deflection of what is going on.

It’s the rut of superficiality. This is a short piece of writing, so there’s bound to be an easy fix, right? Sadly, there’s no silver bullet for superficiality: it has so be addressed in repeated, deliberate steps.

Here are a few suggestions as to what those steps might be:

• If your group has been meeting for a long time, you may need to mix things up a little. Create an environment where people can talk together in smaller groups—having conversations one-on-one, or in threes, can lead to deeper engagement, especially if this smaller group has only a single question to consider and a short period of time to engage.
• Change the way people sit together. It will (after they’ve navigated the initial shock of change) help them bring fresh perspectives to what they’re doing.
• Be prepared to share some of your own struggles, bit by bit, with the larger group. Change the norms of the group by changing the behaviour that you consider normal.
• Try some new activities (go out for dinner as a group somewhere, but allow some time for people to walk to and from the location) where there is a chance for people to converse, so they’re interacting outside of the standard group situation.

If you’re starting a new group, the process will be different:

• Be deliberate in explaining what you expect from the group in terms of sharing and application.
• Ask people to commit to changing their lives as they read the Bible together.

In either case, when sharing prayer points, think about how you can find a balance between endlessly talking about what needs prayer and actually praying.

If you’re trying to address superficiality in another context (e.g. the gathering after the formal part of church is over), then think about a question you can lead off with. Instead of your conversations drifting straight into the shallow, you could draw attention to the sermon topic.

It takes time to change the norms of a group, to move from being a series of isolated islands to being a functioning part of the body of Christ. Be patient, be prayerful, and persevere.

Photo credit: pira7ex